im so sorry that i have neglected my poor blog im in the process of moving so i will be back with good stories and some new things within a couple of weeks
love to see you smile
the storyteller
Saturday, September 19, 2009
Sunday, August 9, 2009
Really is that it ?
Sorry that I am taking so long adding new stories but I've been extremely busy. I promise to at least hook yall up with 2 more stories this week. So with no further intro I titled this one "Really Is That It?"
I know I shouldn't be putting dudes business out there but, this dudes dick was soooo fucking small it couldn't even tickle my belly button...lol I know that that is wrong but this here a grown man going round telling girls that he gone put it on them. When he pulled it out I literally pulled out my gps to give me directions to find his small as dick. Don't by far get me wrong dude is sexy as hell but his dick belongs to my 5 yr old nephews puppy. we met through on of my home girls cause he worked with her and she knew off the back that I would like him and she was right. see me I don't mind fucking off the back I ain't no hoe that's just me I like dick and when I saw dude I knew me that he could get it. so for about a week we chit chatted and he told me about how he was a dick slanger and how he can do this and that and how he had a big dick.....lol so finally it was time for our date....well we didn't get outta my house all that talk made me want him so when we got in my room I was laying on top of him and you know how you can usually see a mans wood through his pants? well i didn't so I went in for the kill getting ready to suck his dick he whipped that shit out and I was like really is that it. he got mad cause I was laughing sooo hard cause I couldn't believe this nigga was trying to fuck me with his gummy bear dick. needless to say I told him to kick rocks and I haven't seen him since
I know I shouldn't be putting dudes business out there but, this dudes dick was soooo fucking small it couldn't even tickle my belly button...lol I know that that is wrong but this here a grown man going round telling girls that he gone put it on them. When he pulled it out I literally pulled out my gps to give me directions to find his small as dick. Don't by far get me wrong dude is sexy as hell but his dick belongs to my 5 yr old nephews puppy. we met through on of my home girls cause he worked with her and she knew off the back that I would like him and she was right. see me I don't mind fucking off the back I ain't no hoe that's just me I like dick and when I saw dude I knew me that he could get it. so for about a week we chit chatted and he told me about how he was a dick slanger and how he can do this and that and how he had a big dick.....lol so finally it was time for our date....well we didn't get outta my house all that talk made me want him so when we got in my room I was laying on top of him and you know how you can usually see a mans wood through his pants? well i didn't so I went in for the kill getting ready to suck his dick he whipped that shit out and I was like really is that it. he got mad cause I was laughing sooo hard cause I couldn't believe this nigga was trying to fuck me with his gummy bear dick. needless to say I told him to kick rocks and I haven't seen him since
Friday, July 17, 2009
EATING OUT
WOW!! THIS STORY GIVES NEW MEANING TO EAT
Okay imma make this short back when I like 19 I use to mess wit this Spanish guy and well I guess that he wasn't all that experienced in the head department and well he would always tell me about how much he wanted to eat me out and amongst other things. Okay so one night after a date I decided to see if he was what he said he was and well it wasn't that good but it was cool so(back in the days it was all about nikkas eating me out) I kept him around. The next time we did it I went back to his house and one thing led to another and he started to go down on me and well I started to notice that it wasn't as good I thought it was but I learned that you never tell a guy that he sucks at shit when its pertaining to the bed room so I didn't and well he started getting rough and I guess he was getting really aroused and well he started even more rough and well he BIT ME I mean this fucker BIT THE SHIT OUTTA MY CLIT. I punched the shit outta the side of his face. After I had calmed down I asked him why did he bite me this dumb ass nikka gonna tell me "YOU SAID EAT ME". I was to done with him
GNR..NO NO BOO BOO EAT ME IS A METAPHOR ....DUDES AND SOME WOMEN YOU DONT RELLY EAT THE PUSS YOU SIMPLY NIBBLE ON IT NO TEETH ..LOL I WOULDVE PUNCHED THE SHIT OUTTA HIM TOO
Okay imma make this short back when I like 19 I use to mess wit this Spanish guy and well I guess that he wasn't all that experienced in the head department and well he would always tell me about how much he wanted to eat me out and amongst other things. Okay so one night after a date I decided to see if he was what he said he was and well it wasn't that good but it was cool so(back in the days it was all about nikkas eating me out) I kept him around. The next time we did it I went back to his house and one thing led to another and he started to go down on me and well I started to notice that it wasn't as good I thought it was but I learned that you never tell a guy that he sucks at shit when its pertaining to the bed room so I didn't and well he started getting rough and I guess he was getting really aroused and well he started even more rough and well he BIT ME I mean this fucker BIT THE SHIT OUTTA MY CLIT. I punched the shit outta the side of his face. After I had calmed down I asked him why did he bite me this dumb ass nikka gonna tell me "YOU SAID EAT ME". I was to done with him
GNR..NO NO BOO BOO EAT ME IS A METAPHOR ....DUDES AND SOME WOMEN YOU DONT RELLY EAT THE PUSS YOU SIMPLY NIBBLE ON IT NO TEETH ..LOL I WOULDVE PUNCHED THE SHIT OUTTA HIM TOO
Thursday, July 2, 2009
So Emotional
All I can say is that I was SMDH while I was reading this one
I call this lil story "So Emotional"
Hey girl, Imma keep this short and sweet. Let me just tell you that a sensitive man is not always a good man to have around. I was fucking with this brother out here in D.C. Hands down this brother is sexy fine 6' 5 dark skin big dyck the works. I can't exactly remember when I met dude at but shit it didn't matter. Well when we finally got to it every thing was glory to the hallelujah up in the bed until til brother came. I tell you no lie I thought that maybe my supper time was just that damn good cause every time brother would come he would bust out in to tears I mean literally he would cry. who the fuck does that shit that's some white bitch shit crying during sex. like I said the 1st time he pulled that crying shit I was like yeah I got that ill na na but then he did it again so when I asked he tried to play it off like naw its I don't be crying. I gave him that dude get the fuck outta here look. I had to stop fucking with him cause that shit was creeping me out I didn't know if he was crying cause my shit was good or bad
like i said smdh
I call this lil story "So Emotional"
Hey girl, Imma keep this short and sweet. Let me just tell you that a sensitive man is not always a good man to have around. I was fucking with this brother out here in D.C. Hands down this brother is sexy fine 6' 5 dark skin big dyck the works. I can't exactly remember when I met dude at but shit it didn't matter. Well when we finally got to it every thing was glory to the hallelujah up in the bed until til brother came. I tell you no lie I thought that maybe my supper time was just that damn good cause every time brother would come he would bust out in to tears I mean literally he would cry. who the fuck does that shit that's some white bitch shit crying during sex. like I said the 1st time he pulled that crying shit I was like yeah I got that ill na na but then he did it again so when I asked he tried to play it off like naw its I don't be crying. I gave him that dude get the fuck outta here look. I had to stop fucking with him cause that shit was creeping me out I didn't know if he was crying cause my shit was good or bad
like i said smdh
Sunday, June 7, 2009
Great Expectations
Now all the ladies and fellas really need to read this one. This is the reason why I made this blog.
I titled this one "Great EXPECTATIONS"
OHHHH I hate a dude that talks the talk but can't walk the walk. It all started a couple of yrs ago when I met dude on the Internet though he and I went to high school together and he claimed he knew me I never knew him. Well yrs of talking to each other over the net. He would tell me about how he was the king ding-a-ling and he laid this and that girl down. Me being the freak that I am was ready able and willing to see if this was all true. SOOOOOOO! We finally decided to meet up one night, though sex wasn't on my mind I wasn't ruling it out. Well I got to his house everything was cool we sat and talked for a little while. He asked me for a kiss and i thought that it was sooo sweet and it was good i have to admit dude can kiss. So we decided to move things to to his room. That's my people is when the MAGIC happen (well at least i thought it was). We keep kissing and started undressing . LOL when dude dropped his pants all i could think about was those crayons that you get in art class back in elementary.You know them fat crayons well his dick was actual size. Can you say disappointed!!!! So we started off Missionary style.Who the fuck does that shit 1st that song virgin shit. To make matters worst dude couldn't find it. I'm not fat at all the most fat i have on me is in my ass. So how could he not find. I started thinking that maybe it was his 1st, I mean missionary position he couldn't find the hole. He asked me to ride but I told him no so he flipped me over to hit it from the back and he was complaining about my height *side note* both of us are 5'9) . Okay he finally got in it and as soon as he got in it he made a little sound which let me know that he came. In my mind I was like WTF!!. After it was over I sat and chilled with him for a little while longer than I left. We still talk and he wants to have sex again but I was traumatized from it and have yet to bring myself to tell him. And he still talks about how he did this girl and that girl I just sit back and shake my head cause I know the truth.
NO COMMENT
I titled this one "Great EXPECTATIONS"
OHHHH I hate a dude that talks the talk but can't walk the walk. It all started a couple of yrs ago when I met dude on the Internet though he and I went to high school together and he claimed he knew me I never knew him. Well yrs of talking to each other over the net. He would tell me about how he was the king ding-a-ling and he laid this and that girl down. Me being the freak that I am was ready able and willing to see if this was all true. SOOOOOOO! We finally decided to meet up one night, though sex wasn't on my mind I wasn't ruling it out. Well I got to his house everything was cool we sat and talked for a little while. He asked me for a kiss and i thought that it was sooo sweet and it was good i have to admit dude can kiss. So we decided to move things to to his room. That's my people is when the MAGIC happen (well at least i thought it was). We keep kissing and started undressing . LOL when dude dropped his pants all i could think about was those crayons that you get in art class back in elementary.You know them fat crayons well his dick was actual size. Can you say disappointed!!!! So we started off Missionary style.Who the fuck does that shit 1st that song virgin shit. To make matters worst dude couldn't find it. I'm not fat at all the most fat i have on me is in my ass. So how could he not find. I started thinking that maybe it was his 1st, I mean missionary position he couldn't find the hole. He asked me to ride but I told him no so he flipped me over to hit it from the back and he was complaining about my height *side note* both of us are 5'9) . Okay he finally got in it and as soon as he got in it he made a little sound which let me know that he came. In my mind I was like WTF!!. After it was over I sat and chilled with him for a little while longer than I left. We still talk and he wants to have sex again but I was traumatized from it and have yet to bring myself to tell him. And he still talks about how he did this girl and that girl I just sit back and shake my head cause I know the truth.
NO COMMENT
Monday, June 1, 2009
What Was That!!
LOL so far all the stories I'm getting are basically basically bashing men and they sex performances but I actually have one about a girl.. I call this one What Was That?
When I meet chick everything was perfect I decided to take it slow. She was special real cute red-bone 5'5 thick as hell. Damn she was fine! I was seriously trying to wife her, but it was just to damn perfect she had to have a flaw. Besides the fact that the bitch was crazy and some what of a stalker. She had what I called a let go problem. Just so ya'll ladies don't start hating on a brother I left her because she was crazy. Yeah so the 1st time we had sex. She gave me brains like it was no tomorrow so It was all fair that I gave her some face time. So, I'm down there doing my thing and I hear this noise.I know sometimes when you keep poking in the hole it gets air pockets and make noises it queefs. So I decided to continue, I got back in the groove and I'd be damn if it didn't happen again. But this time I asked her if she was farting and she assured me no she wasn't. I went along and started tearing that ass up from the back and it seemed like every time I went in it she would let out a sound, then I started noticing my stomach getting hot. Then what drew the line was that one of them sounded like she was starting up a engine..smelled like one too. I couldn't take it anymore my dick got soft and she got mad. I tried to fuck a couple times after that but it was the same ol' shit and it smelled like it too. My boys clowned me for months. I knew it was to good to be true besides the bitch was crazy she has a gas problem.
ROTFLMAO who farts while fucking that's disgusting
When I meet chick everything was perfect I decided to take it slow. She was special real cute red-bone 5'5 thick as hell. Damn she was fine! I was seriously trying to wife her, but it was just to damn perfect she had to have a flaw. Besides the fact that the bitch was crazy and some what of a stalker. She had what I called a let go problem. Just so ya'll ladies don't start hating on a brother I left her because she was crazy. Yeah so the 1st time we had sex. She gave me brains like it was no tomorrow so It was all fair that I gave her some face time. So, I'm down there doing my thing and I hear this noise.I know sometimes when you keep poking in the hole it gets air pockets and make noises it queefs. So I decided to continue, I got back in the groove and I'd be damn if it didn't happen again. But this time I asked her if she was farting and she assured me no she wasn't. I went along and started tearing that ass up from the back and it seemed like every time I went in it she would let out a sound, then I started noticing my stomach getting hot. Then what drew the line was that one of them sounded like she was starting up a engine..smelled like one too. I couldn't take it anymore my dick got soft and she got mad. I tried to fuck a couple times after that but it was the same ol' shit and it smelled like it too. My boys clowned me for months. I knew it was to good to be true besides the bitch was crazy she has a gas problem.
ROTFLMAO who farts while fucking that's disgusting
Friday, May 29, 2009
Mus-Stank
ROTFLMAO @ this story it took me a while to try and edit it cause this one was funny as hell.
I call this one "MUS-STANK"
I have learned my lesson. I am never meeting a guy on the over the Internet ever again. Okay this is how it all started Two yrs ago my friends with they old asses talked me in to setting up a Myspace page. At first I wasn't really in to it that much cause really I had better things to do with my life. Long story short this little nice looking 21 yr old guy started sending me messages so I added him and we started chatting. We exchanged yahoo messenger names and took the converts over there and I learned that we actually stay like 10 mins away from each other and thats when he started asking can he come and pay me a visit before that moment I had never told him my age by the way yall at that time I was 37 and once again he was 21 and I had a 16 yr old daughter so you know that him coming to my house was out of the question. So I decieded to go to his apartment. Okay , when I stepped in to his apt me I was like wow this is clean for a guy that stays by hisself but the moment that thought came in my head was as quick as it left cause the rancid smell from his apartment hit my nose so hard I was like what the hell. Like a fool I stayed. So we went and sat down on his couch and started watching a movie and this lil nigga tried that yawn lift arm up and then place it on the girl shoulder move. I started laughing cause i remembered that he was only 21,but then that thought was taken away from me because i started smelling a new smell. Little guy must have skipped like 5 days with out deodarent cause he was so musty lik bum on the side of the road musty plus he thought that it was good to lean in for a kiss and OMG! his breath smelled like straight GETBACK* breath by that time i was through with him I politely told him "Look you knew that I was coming over you couldnt have sprayed some air freshner in your house lit some incense matter of fact put some deordarant or something?" he started laughing said my bad be right back. Why o' Why didn't I leave when he went to go freshing his stanking ass up. This nasty as nigga came back out from the shower and dropped his towel and said "Come on let's fuck!, but wait! is my dick too small?". I got out of his apartment so quick sped my ass back to my house, hopped my ass in the shower almost considered burning my clothes cause they had the esscense of funk on them and then I politly called him up and said "look don't ever call or try to make any form of contact to me ever again." a couple of months later I was at the Wal-Mart with my 10 yr old son and Mus-Stank was there. He actually made sure that I noticed him.When I saw him i spoke and walked off FAST.
*GETBACK Breath- stank ass breath that when it smell hits you it makes you wan get the hell back from the persons face
okay okay dudes just like you want us ladies to be all smelling fresh for yall imma need yall to be doing the same it aint nothing like a sexy ass nigga that smelling all good from head to toe.
I call this one "MUS-STANK"
I have learned my lesson. I am never meeting a guy on the over the Internet ever again. Okay this is how it all started Two yrs ago my friends with they old asses talked me in to setting up a Myspace page. At first I wasn't really in to it that much cause really I had better things to do with my life. Long story short this little nice looking 21 yr old guy started sending me messages so I added him and we started chatting. We exchanged yahoo messenger names and took the converts over there and I learned that we actually stay like 10 mins away from each other and thats when he started asking can he come and pay me a visit before that moment I had never told him my age by the way yall at that time I was 37 and once again he was 21 and I had a 16 yr old daughter so you know that him coming to my house was out of the question. So I decieded to go to his apartment. Okay , when I stepped in to his apt me I was like wow this is clean for a guy that stays by hisself but the moment that thought came in my head was as quick as it left cause the rancid smell from his apartment hit my nose so hard I was like what the hell. Like a fool I stayed. So we went and sat down on his couch and started watching a movie and this lil nigga tried that yawn lift arm up and then place it on the girl shoulder move. I started laughing cause i remembered that he was only 21,but then that thought was taken away from me because i started smelling a new smell. Little guy must have skipped like 5 days with out deodarent cause he was so musty lik bum on the side of the road musty plus he thought that it was good to lean in for a kiss and OMG! his breath smelled like straight GETBACK* breath by that time i was through with him I politely told him "Look you knew that I was coming over you couldnt have sprayed some air freshner in your house lit some incense matter of fact put some deordarant or something?" he started laughing said my bad be right back. Why o' Why didn't I leave when he went to go freshing his stanking ass up. This nasty as nigga came back out from the shower and dropped his towel and said "Come on let's fuck!, but wait! is my dick too small?". I got out of his apartment so quick sped my ass back to my house, hopped my ass in the shower almost considered burning my clothes cause they had the esscense of funk on them and then I politly called him up and said "look don't ever call or try to make any form of contact to me ever again." a couple of months later I was at the Wal-Mart with my 10 yr old son and Mus-Stank was there. He actually made sure that I noticed him.When I saw him i spoke and walked off FAST.
*GETBACK Breath- stank ass breath that when it smell hits you it makes you wan get the hell back from the persons face
okay okay dudes just like you want us ladies to be all smelling fresh for yall imma need yall to be doing the same it aint nothing like a sexy ass nigga that smelling all good from head to toe.
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